Forget it, today is just about Britney.
I think I'm starting to OD on Britney cause it's beginning to look like almost all the other stars took the day off. Shock of all shocks her new album blackout hit the internet and it's meoteric rise up the charts seems to have stalled out at number 76 according to amazon. I can't figure out why, that Gimmie song is so catchy. Yo, it's Britney bitch, gimmie, gimmie, gimmie, gimmie...please shoot me.<
Britney's got excuses.
You gotta love Britney she's got and excuse for everything (except hit and run). She's blaming the fact that she lost custody of her children on her cell phone. She says that she didn't give her contact information for random drug testing because she gets bad cell phone reception in her home...yeah, and I suppose the dog ate her homework too.
Rose McGowan will ruin your life.
In what may go down in history as one of the most obivious cases of nepotism ever, director Robert Rodriguez has cast his fiancee Rose McGowan for the lead role in his remake of "Barbarella". Universal studios has backed out of the deal as result and the general feeling among insiders is that they do not believe that Rose can carry the role. Rodriguez is said to be looking around trying to find other investors for the film.
This is what you get when you dump your wife for Rose McGowan. Ironic isn't it?
Britney Spears is driving into things again.
Britney ran over the foot of a TMZ.com cameraman while leaving an L.A. medical faciltity today. The cameraman was not injured which is good because in true Britney style when she realized what she did she promptly gasped shock and peeled out there!
Ok, L.A.P.D. you guys watch tv just like the rest of us. It's not like you know what's going on here people. Now get out your note pads and take this down....FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP HER!!!
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Jennifer Lopez is a Loser
J-Lo's new album "Brave" is bravely going down faster than the Hindenburg. It didn't even make the top ten on Billboard and has only sold a laughable 53,000 copies. I think Kanye West could do a little better than that. Man, check out the Billboard list if you get a chance. She ass kicked by pretty much everybody.....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!...I don't like her.
Ricky Martin Gets Star on Walk of Fame
Do you remember a time when you actually need talent and star power to get one of these? If they're giving them out to washed up has-been's like Ricky Martin they'll give them to anybody. I'll be expecting mine by next week.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Nick Hogan is Screwed
The cops released a report on the Nick Hogan crash today that was a little skimpy on the details. The drug test results have still not come back yet in his accident which left John Graziano with permanent brain damage. Personally, I don't think Nick was on anything I think he's an idiot with a driving record that should have made someone stop him before it came to this.
(Image from http://www.sescoops.com/galleries)
(Image from http://www.sescoops.com/galleries)
Orlando Bloom is Kind of a Jerk
Good old Orland "I'm not on anything" Bloom, first he crashed into a parked car breaking a girls neck, then he tries walk away from the scene of the accident (leaving behind said girl with broken neck)but now Mark Invanko didn't even get so much as an "I'm sorry" out of him for hitting his car. Of course if he won't stick around for a friend with a broken neck, he probably doesn't give a crap about your car.
The Spice Girls / Victoria's Secret Factor
The new Spice Girls Greatest Hits album will not be sold in record stores. They've made a deal to have the album available only online and at Victoria's Secret stores. I guess it kind of makes sense, if you're in the business of selling lingerie who better to have as your spokeswomen than a bunch of whores?
The Dalai Lama Knows How to Travel in Style!
You're favorite spiritual guru the Dalai Lama (who?) is in New York City and man does this guy know how to travel. No Motel 6 for him only the best will do. So he's chillin out at the Carlyle Hotel. Easily one of the most expensive hotels in New York. Their cheapest room is like $700 bucks a night. Jesus Christ! I'm guessing being the Dalai Lama does not require a vow of poverty!
Lindsey Lohan is Broke
OK, this one shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone. Let's do some basic math. 1 million dollar hotel bill + $137,000 in rehab bills + Lord knows how much in attorney fees = SCREWED!!! Very good, you get an A+ Lindsey!
Britney gets booked
Britney turned herself into the LAPD today to get booked for her hit and run. She was only there for an hour and was polite and very courteous which only gives more weight to my personal theory that there's more than one person living in that head. (and between you and me, she's a lot more interesting when she's doing something crazy)
Michael Jackson is a trustworthy dude
Jacko's in trouble again...yes, I'm stunned too. Apparently Mad Mike likes to take stuff and not pay for it. A judge today ordered him to cough up the $175,000 he owes his attorneys that he never got around to paying them. Jack's always got more up his sleeve cause he's also being sued by the Prince of Bahrain (where the is that anyway?). The Prince gave Jackson 7 million dollars up front, paid for all of his living expenses and built him a recording studio. In exchange Jackson was supposed to record two albums and create a broadway style show for the Prince. Jackson promptly took the money and fled the country. Nice one Mike. Don't let this guy borrow your car keys.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
It's all about you Britney, it's all about you.
1Looks like everyone else in L.A. had the day off because almost everything today was pretty much centered around Britney. Let's see if I can sum this whole thing up as briefly as possible.
Ok, first she calls for an "emergency" court hearing to request more time with the kids (never mind that the original court orders have only been in effect for a week but hey, this is Britney so she had MORE than enough time to prove she's a fit mother, but I digress) that was yesterday. Then, she goes hanging out in Marina Del Ray until 2a.m. in the morning last night (court hearing is for 8:30a.m. this morning)....ok so she sleeps a little later then she should have so she's only 5 hours late. Not bad, this is an improvement for her maybe she has changed! I don't need to tell you that K-Fed was against the children spending more time with her (can't figure out why). Now I thought it was a little strange that she had been seen recently with her estranged mother and now I know why. She wants the court appointed monitor to be her mother Lynne. Don't think that one's gonna fly. In the end the judge ruled that she can have one overnight supervised visit with the kiddies per week and I think even that much is a horrible idea. Why don't you just throw them into a giant blender and end their misery now. There's not enough money in the world that would make me want to grow up in a crazy household with that friggin lunatic as a mother!1
Ok, first she calls for an "emergency" court hearing to request more time with the kids (never mind that the original court orders have only been in effect for a week but hey, this is Britney so she had MORE than enough time to prove she's a fit mother, but I digress) that was yesterday. Then, she goes hanging out in Marina Del Ray until 2a.m. in the morning last night (court hearing is for 8:30a.m. this morning)....ok so she sleeps a little later then she should have so she's only 5 hours late. Not bad, this is an improvement for her maybe she has changed! I don't need to tell you that K-Fed was against the children spending more time with her (can't figure out why). Now I thought it was a little strange that she had been seen recently with her estranged mother and now I know why. She wants the court appointed monitor to be her mother Lynne. Don't think that one's gonna fly. In the end the judge ruled that she can have one overnight supervised visit with the kiddies per week and I think even that much is a horrible idea. Why don't you just throw them into a giant blender and end their misery now. There's not enough money in the world that would make me want to grow up in a crazy household with that friggin lunatic as a mother!1
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Brown is down!...no wait...he's up again.
Bobby Brown had a heart attack scare today and was hospitalized briefly to make sure that he's ok. Must have happened when he found out Whitney is making a comeback. Unfortunately, he pulled through.
Save the Hoff!!!
David Hasselhoff was hospitalized for what is being called a "relapse". Doctors and medical experts like myself call this condition ALCOHOL POISIONING. Get that boy another hamburger, I get the feeling the kids might be going back to stay with mom. Seriously, is there anyone in Hollywood who isn't hooked on something!?!
Denis Richards is crazy.
Man this crazy bitch just won't leave Charlie Sheen alone. First she said that she wanted his sperm so she could have another kid and now she talks to Cindy Adams and tells her that she did't really want the sperm, she just wanted to make fiancee jealous. This chick is just plain sick man. Just look at those eyes, you can friggin TELL she's psycho!
Kick his ass Bonaduce!
Johnny Fairplay is suing Danny Bonaduce for his flight face first onto a stage floor. Although I'm not so sure that suing Bonaduce is a very smart idea. Johnny, seriously. Stop pissing this guy off. I guess he still has a few more teeth that he wouldn't mind loosing. Hope he's got a good HMO.