Hey! Let's glamorize teen pregnancy!!!

Well, Jamie Lynn Spears' mom whored her daughters out so why not continue that noble tradition with OK magazine! They've got an exclusive (paid through the nose) interview with America's most beloved teen role model! Let's check some bits out shall we?:

The younger sister of Britney Spears (damn woman you're not even important enough to have your own NAME!) tells OK! that being away from the shining lights of Hollywood is making it all easier to learn the ins and outs of first-time motherhood. "Around here, everyone has the same focus," (inbreeding?) Jamie Lynn tells OK!. "The focus is family, and that's a good way to live." I(how old are you?)

"They'd told me it would be an eight- to 12-hour labor, and I was ready to have the baby in three to four hours," (but they induced your labor so I'm not so sure if that estimate counts) Jamie Lynn tells OK!. "I had a perfect pregnancy and a perfect delivery. I was very blessed." (yes, all 16-17 year olds should be so "blessed")



While the former (emphasis on former) Zoey 101 star and her fiancé have not yet set a date for their wedding (and never will), the couple remains closer than ever (get the fuck out of my house). Jamie Lynn, who tells OK! that while her labor was induced, she gave birth naturally (as opposed to unnaturally?) and without complications, says that Casey was the one person she wanted in the delivery room with her. "Once I got in there, my doctor was just so calm and so good it was not bad at all," she says. "I was just talking to Casey. And you know what's so weird? I was asking him if he was okay. He was like, 'Yeah.' We were both so excited." (to have ruined our lives and/or careers)

"She is very good," says Jamie Lynn. "She'll feed every two or three hours. (it's so much fun every time I'm trying to fucking relax!) When she wakes up in the middle of the night (I want to kill her), I'll feed her and she goes right back to sleep. There's no screaming and crying." (hard to scream when you're being smothered)

"We get up in the morning, and she gets her little bath. Then I get my bath. (nothing like babies having babies) We have a routine, and I love routines. (too easy, next) I've worked one out with her, and we're happy going about our little life." (and how little it is Jamie, how very little)

Even if you didn't know who Jamie Lynn Spears was reading these little nuggets of wisdom would tell anyone that we are dealing with a child who has no clue what she has done to her life. I wonder when she's going to give an exclusive interview on everything that newborn babies do that make you want to throw them out the fucking window. I can't wait to look at the national statistics just to see how many teens follow her fine example.

Keep working America! Teen mothers on welfare are depending on you!!!

...fucking worthless maggots.